The fag-smoking, sequin-wearing supermodel is indicating no signs of growing up thank God. As the on-set shoots from Ab Fab: The Movie prove, shes pure panto
All children, except one, grow up, JM Barrie wrote in the first line of Peter Pan in 1904; a century afterward, Kate Moss came along and demonstrated him wrong. And that is why we love Mossy so much, because like Peter, she never grows up, so she never get boring. For everyone else even the most glorious youth must either accident and burn, or come to a slow halt in middle-aged respectability. Merely Moss maintains on maintaining on. She is our very own naughty fairy.
Which is why the photos of Moss in a green sequin dress on the situated of the Absolutely Fabulous movie sum up everything we want to be, do and wear this Christmas. To recap: Moss is appearing in the forthcoming Ab Fab movie, and has been papped on define, on the banks of the Thames. To the ranks of Botticellis Venus and Ursula Andress in Dr No, we can now add a modern wet-look goddess. Moss walks out of the river, smoking, soaked to the skin, in a floorlength green sequin gown, Thames water dripping off those cheekbones. A month after the first photos of Perfectly FabuMoss appeared, she was back on define last week wearing the same green dress, this time teamed with a Burberry leopard-print coat and a scruffy pair of Adidas trainers. Queen.
The cigarette is a key prop, though not because anyone still guesses smoking is cool. Not even because smoking , no longer socially acceptable , now looks debauched; were over that too. These days, a cigarette looks mildly camp, in the same style that champagne flutes and mink coats seem camp. One can appreciate the symbolic glamour of a mink, without wanting to wear dead animal skin oneself. Its the same with cigarettes: now that they have mostly disappeared from real life the objective is, like fairy illuminates on the tree, part of the twinkling stage set of the party season.
Christmas at its best is high camp. This is what people who believe Christmas is twee dont get, and what unites those who exemplify Christmas spirit at its best. From Nigella with her black treacle ham to Will Ferrell in Elf, the panto spirit is alive and well, and thats why we love it. Moss in her sequin dress is pure panto, with the Maleficent cheekbones of a wicked stepmother and that bawdy Croydon cackle. Have you noticed how the same paparazzi who find their most unflattering photos of most female celebrities by catching them with Bitchy Resting Face get their unfortunate photos of Moss when she is laughing? It is a throaty cackle of a laugh, mouth open, and it gives her a doubled chin. A funny thing has happened over the past couple of years. Way, belatedly, has acquired a sense of humour. It began , not very promisingly, with Cara Delevingnes talent for inducing herself cross-eyed, and spiralled when an army of millenial-era models discovered that, by adding an arched eyebrow, the old-as-the-hills vanity move of magnified cheekbone sucking-in photos could be rebranded as humour. But now, things are looking up. Not only is the Utterly Fabulous film in the pipeline, but Zoolander 2 is simply two months away.
Ill say to you another reason I love Moss in her wet-look glory, and thats because shes in the Thames and not swimming a bloody triathlon. The new issue of Vogue reports on how the kind of humbling endurance exams all sensible people left behind once we had successfully retrieved a plastic brick from the bottom of a swimming pool in our pyjamas aged 12 had now become de rigueur social activities. Doing Tough Mudder en masse is the new skiing weekend, apparently. A new wave of glamorous sport boutiques specialise in decorator wetsuits, tri-suits, cycling gear and boxing gloves. The interview with cover girl Gigi Hadid, in the same issue of Vogue, begins ringside as the model boxes in the training ring. And in the midst of all this madness sails Moss in sequins cigarette aloft, as if miming along with the great Kathy Burke as Waynetta I AM SMOKING A FAG Slob. She is, candidly, a breath of fresh air.
Last but not least: that dress. Its perfect. The dress of 2015 was surely the Balmain x H& M green sequin microfrock worn by Kendall Jenner in the advertising campaign, which pretty much crashed the internet when it went on sale for APS1 19.99. Last week, Julianne Moore the eternal poster girl of emerald party dresses wore sparkly green Chanel Couture at the Hunger Games: Mockingjay, Part 2 premiere. Green sequins are where its at. Being camply fun is where its at. Not swimming bloody triathlons is where its at. Rumour has it that Mosss character is killed off in the Absolutely Fabulous movie surely not! but this Christmas, shes at the top of the tree.
Read more: www.theguardian.com